


And Over

by orphan_account



Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen, M/M, Meta, Microfic, Stream of Consciousness, Uchiha Massacre, Unreliable Narrator, the right amount of homoromanticism that this show has to offer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-21
Updated: 2019-07-21
Packaged: 2020-07-09 17:47:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19891846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Your one and only was a man without manners and brain and a sense of self-preservation. You would die for him and to tell the truth that was exactly what you were doing. You fought back and then it started all over again.





	And Over

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MooseintheRain](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MooseintheRain/gifts).



> Because we talked about the Uchiha massacre and I just couldn't let that thought leave my head.  
> It feels honestly great to write for Naruto again!

> _死なうかと 囁かれしは 蛍の夜_
> 
> _“Shall we die together?”_
> 
> _You whispered to me_
> 
> _At the night of firefly._

Then there was the start. You would start back up again and then Naruto landed a punch and you threw one back exactly where you know it would hurt. You don't really understand how it had continued for hours because it had felt like days and then you would be back again throwing the exact landing at the exact same place. You hurt when he hurt but it was exactly why you hurt him. Your one and only was a man without manners and brain and a sense of self-preservation. You would die for him and to tell the truth that was exactly what you were doing. You fought back and then it started all over again. 

It also started in other places. When teachers asked you for answers of a question no one understood and no one wanted to answer and you would answer because this was how it worked. A place without your brilliant brother and a place where you would answer instead of him. A place where you questioned all but none answers delivered and you would invent answers yourself like any child with a serious gruesome imagination for the worse. It also started when you were all alone and all scared and really you think should be forgiven because alone was worst than being dead but you knew it wasn't. Parents were dead and so was everyone else. It started and over.

You would revive the Uchiha clan but then you shouldn't because you can't think of being another tool and alone without being alone a broken family again. You think of another linage of tragedy like yourself and before you and after you and it just didn't make sense anymore. You were nothing but a logical man. But you thought you know the best of Sharingan and you didn't you thought you knew when to give up Naruto and you didn't but you know when to stop make suffering a circle and a cycle and another tragedy and so you did. You wouldn't revive the Uchiha clan and Naruto's eyes were shining when dawn fell over you. 

Naruto would agree like he would agree that ramen is the best meal to have at three in the morning he would agree anything with you as long as it wasn't about destruction or Konoha or war or death or anything else. He talked of hope like it was the appetizer for a new plan in Ichiaku. 

Naruto was a creature and you were something of that kind as well. You want to die with him not because you thought a heroic death for both of you but because he deserved it. Naruto deserved that respect and acknowledged that you will go over for him and you will bring him over. Over and over he had tried to die with you and over and over you did too and they had all failed like failed assassination attempts at a S-rank mission because he was too powerful and you were too powerless to stop him. When you wanted to lie to yourself you would say the opposite but he was looking at you with the same eyes three years ago and as suddenly as you can convince yourself you can't anymore. 

You realized that this was Naruto's story and you were glad that Naruto was the one who was holding the thread of it. He would pull and you would fall and he would go over and you would spill the words like spilling water from a too full glass. You would try to kill him and you know he will try to kill you back and that was alright. Naruto was the first word you learned to say without dread in your stomach and without memories to remove Naruto was the only word you would whisper over and over and you would get tired of whispering but never the name. You didn't suspect you love him because it wasn't love it was not something that could be called love because they don't love over the edge like that with no one to hold them over when they would fall. You didn't love him because when he looked back into your eyes you looked back in and found something greater. Anyone can be loved but not Naruto. 

You were afraid to say that Naruto's eyes couldn't be loved anymore than nature loved her children. Naruto was like wind and water and grass and everything else in between and he didn't surrender in the vastness of himself and everything and anyone could not help but be surrounded by him like nature did. Naruto couldn't be loved anymore than he was made of it. 

You said to yourself that this could have been different and yet you knew it wouldn't. You can't imagine another world where Naruto was not the pivotal screw and turned and turned around you until you suffocate under it. He only followed but you knew you were the follower. You were proud that the idea of dying together was yours and no one else's before Naruto. Your brother would die for the village and he did. You wouldn't because you had already found someone else to die for when you were twelve with a thousand needles behind your back and blood streaming down your face and you couldn't be more sure that you would do it over and again and over. 

_Come home with me_ Naruto would ask with his badly bruised eyes and you would be slightly confused and angry because you were already home and the person that was home didn't at least greet you with a welcome back. And then Naruto saw it and blinked and said with a sad and pure expression that you didn't understood until you finally did _Come home to me_ he said and he know that you will not refuse. 

You were here before with him and it was the same thing without being the same thing. They fought cheaply and freely and cheaply and bloodily and cheaply and happily. They were all that now and none of the incomprehension that clouded their battles before. You were now sure that you would die or live together and the outcome wouldn't change anything because together was a word that you can hear over and over and never get tired of. You were to fight but it was fighting to an end. Nobody fought to an end in the Shinobi world now and you were happy to be the first in their generation. 

Your nindo was something that you haven't thought for a long time and only now you could because it was reassuring to know that they were now fighting themselves to death. It gave you time to think and you couldn't find a single word because it felt like it wouldn't matter so much as long as the nindo was fairly reasonable. Principles won't change your nindo and you won'tchange your principles. And then there was an end. 

Naruto said over you when they were lying on the ground like children again _Come home to me_ and you looked at him and it hurt and you heard him and it hurt and your nindo was out of the window and everything was hurting and you said _I surrender_ because you knew it wasn't surrendering to Naruto but to himself and Itachi and everything else in these three years and over and Naruto said _You're my friend_ and you surrendered to that as well. 

You looked into his eyes and said something unimportant. He heard it all, and over. And over, and over, and so it went. And over you went. And so it goes. 


End file.
